Poetry for Thought

Rain Mania
It rains, sweet drops of smiles,
Musical notes of dreams,
Its heart comes alive,
Beating rapidly, like inside a child.
The radio blares in the background,
A child playing, screaming fake screams of fear,
The lyrics sink through my body,
And my body heaves a sigh of relief.
Dreams come alive, I can still hear the heart beat,
Rythmic, continuous, loud,
The music of the rain gets louder,
Louder still, thunder, lightening.
The tempest of the summer is here,
Summer chills down my spin,
Every inch of my body seems to feel her,
Her tears, her pain, her everything.
It is like I am her,
Now in this moment,
My soul has slipped out and let hers in,
The sounds are clearer, the heart beat's louder.
I can feel her, her breath, heavy,
Fast, I know she's crying,
Though distance separates us,
I can feel her every emotion.
The sounds fade away,
The heart beat remains, louder than before,
The drops mourn with us,
They scream and dream with us.
Time slows down and stops,
Images are lost, thoughts remain,
Tears remain, drops remain,
It rains, drops of emptyness.
The sky mourns, tearing us apart, gently,
The earth mourns, comforting our hearts, gently,
Everything mourns, slowly draining the energy in it all,
We mourn, tears, fears and the agony of it all.
We mourn, together,
The drops comfort, the sounds absorb the pain,
The heart beat feels real, and it continues to rain,
Drops of joy and drops of pain, and I'm wishing for more.

-21st May 2007 ((5:15pm))
Kris

Pass The Ban Bill!!

Its been a while since I had food for thought.
I actually went straight home yesterday, and slept. Almost 12 hours of sleep.

I'm still quiet, like yesterday. I can only think, all my conversations are thought of and not spoken.
If the person with me could network to my head, then we would be having an interesting conversation. I just don't feel like talking. Only necessary sentences come out of my mouth.

I want to do so much, and need to do so much. Time is choking me.

And all I'm thinking of constantly is who are my real friends, rather who are the real people. I'm thinking past the relationships, past the memories, past the routines, past it all.

I really think I should be banned from thinking.

And he just doesn't want me. I know it. He hasn't bothered to call, or e-mail.
Why do I long for his touch, his voice, him?! There was nothing between us, and I feel there will never be. But I still think of him.

I really think I should be banned from thinking.

I need to stop this havoc.

I really think I should be banned from thinking!

Sleeping Beast!

My inner creative side has fallen asleep.
Its irritating.
I need to trottle Her by the neck and wake Her up!

One week has passed by already.
So quick, everything is moving so quick.
Boredom creaps in.
And trust issues too.
Words have become harsh.

I've been thinking too much. I should be banned from doing that!

And then there are those moments which just make you smile, and give you a hope of a happier future.

Like, now I'm listening to the radio, and this song ((don't kno the name! Sorry)) plays everyday, but I still smile, for the lyrics, for the sound, for the whole song!
Its simple...I like simple!

And then those weird moments just become the cherry topping of my life!

"How is it to be you?", someone asked. I guess its alright up here, not all that bad. Though I wish it would be better. Life is going on. Sometimes I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs and abusing life for what it is! And the other times, I could be so happy, that if life was a person I'd kill him/her by squeezing all the air out of their lungs due to my BearHug! Sometimes, I cry with hatred and vengence in my eyes, or cry with a smile and a thought "Life can't get better than this!"

Birthday celebrations are around the corner. So something to look forward to, life's not that bad!
I need to get clothes soon! So shopping is also on my things-to-do list, which by the way I dont like. I cant spend hours shopping! Yes, there is that side to me, where I wont buy it unless I like it, what can I say, I like somethings in a certain way! So until I like something the shopping spree continues, then stops at a cafe for sure!

Anyway, its time to go now! Back to the shelf life I've been leading!
"Chaaaaaaarrrrgeeeeee"
((Loud Trumpet Sounds!))

Lets Go Red!!

Anamika seems to have been tired, of late. Tired of what, is something I'm trying to figure out. Maybe its in the water! Or the air!!? You never know!

The common thing to do when someone is irritable is to leave them alone. Yes, that is the common thing to do. But this Princess can't. I can't leave people I care for alone. Even though it is sometimes necessary! Yes, I am irritating by nature! Family trait, I think!

Saturday evening was spent in vain, trying to make her laugh with the worse kind of jokes in the world! How I made a fool of myself. I think everyone at my table thought I needed to get myself into a mental correctional jail! Including Anamika! Its not a new experience for me or my friends. I get high on air sometimes!! :D Its just how I am.

The evening ended with my failed attempts of making her remotely close to smiling! Which she did, at some point of my not-funny-jokes! All my failed efforts were worth it, as it was for someone I care for! I'm just a softie at heart! I just love everybody a little too much!! Hope you feel elated soon, my Anamika!! I'm always here to irritate you, until you reach the highest level of patience with me!! MUAH!! "I'll be two steps behind...."

champagne supernova - oasis

How many special people change?
How many lives are living strange?
Where were you while we were getting high?
Slowly walking down the hall
Faster than a cannonball
Where were you while we were getting high?
Someday you will find me
Caught beneath the landslide
In a champagne supernova in the sky
Someday you will find me
Caught beneath the landslide
In a champagne supernova
A champagne supernova in the sky
Wake up the dawn and ask her why
A dreamer dreams, she never dies
Wipe that tear away now from your eye
Slowly walking down the hall
Faster than a cannonball
Where were you while we were getting high?
Someday you will find me
Caught beneath the landslide
In a champagne supernova in the sky
Someday you will find me
Caught beneath the landslide
In a champagne supernova
A champagne supernova
'Cuz we don't believe
That they're gonna get away from the summer
But you and I will never die
The world's still spinning around we don't know why
Why-why-why-why-i-i
(guitar solo)
How many special people change?
How many lives are living strange?
Where were you while we were getting high?
Slowly walking down the hall
Faster than a cannonball
Where were you while we were getting high?
Someday you will find me
Caught beneath the landslide
In a champagne supernova in the sky
Someday you will find me
Caught beneath the landslide
In a champagne supernova
A champagne supernova
'Cuz we don't believe
That they're gonna get away from the summer
But you and I will never die
The world's still spinning around we don't know why
Why-why-why-why-i-i
(a really long guitar solo)
(background - sounds like a bunch of "No"'s)
(birds chirping)
(more guitar)
How many special people change?
How many lives are living strange?
Where were you while we were getting high?
We were getting high

Why can't I end it now??

We are born. We learn to talk, walk, eat, drink, run, dance sing. Then we grow up, learn some more things. And at a supple age we are taught to dream of that Prince Charming, who we WILL, most definitely, marry. Yes, we are taught to think that!

Then when we are old enough to understand marriage is really hard, we end up dreaming of everlasting love. It exists, no doubt about that!

Then the lucky ones, among us, end up finding it. Feeling complete. Marring. Living happy lives. With children, who makes them feel equally complete. Who they bring up with utmost care and love. And who have strong moral grounds. They are a family.

The others, think they have found love. Marry. Then find out they don't come close to completing their sentences. But they already have children. Who they love, and don't want to abandon. So, they try, harder and harder, to stay together for those little ones. Being in an Indian society forces them to rethink divorce a million times. And the development in the field of child psychology, helps them rethink divorce for their children's sake. Among these, there are those who don't think, just abandon those who he/she loved just a few years back. And walk away from everything that was perfect, and isn't any more.

So finally life comes down to- being born, growing up, fornicating, reproducing, helping the reproduced grow up and reproduce on their own and then end the long journey of life.

Why can't I end it now???

Pain

Things have taken such drastic turns. She pushes me out. Why does she have to be so stubborn??

The morning keeps playing back in my head and I'm crying. Over and over. I can't concentrate. It breaks my heart. What has happened??? It can't happen. But the fact remains, it has.

I want her to know I'm here. Yet she crushes me and throws me away.

This is hard. I can't face her or her family. I'm afraid. I didn't even stay long enough. If not for her, for them. I didn't even stay.

The agony is consuming me. How must she feel?? I want her to talk to me. Or anybody.